No one likes to have reality checks but it is just something that happens from time to time. Whether God shows us, or someone that you are not expecting it from. Like I said previously I visited Georgetown Baptist Church and really enjoyed it, while sitting through worship and the sermon I had this conviction about not being happy with being single. Now let me back up, a few months ago I read a book which I would recommend to any single girl "When God writes your love story" by The Ludys. It allowed me to "get a grip" if you will. That it was okay that I was 21 and no where near being married, and with no potentials at hand. Like everything, that okayness wore off. God allowed me to move to Austin and in my head I just knew I was going to meet someone here, it just HAD TO HAPPEN. I found myself actively looking everywhere I went, which I thought was a great idea but in all actuality it is not for me. I walked in to church last Sunday and thought "Oh he is nice looking, wonder if he is in the singles group?" "Hmm..I wonder what his name is?" And as I sat there I knew I was wrong and that is NOT what God has in mind for me right now. Now, not that I was lusting after these men but instead of looking at them as my brothers in Christ I was looking for MY potential with them. What if I would cause them stumble? What if they caused me to stumble? All these questions and concerns filled my head I started praying. God allowed me to move to Austin and has handed this ministry over on a silver platter! I knew right then and there that my focus should be the ministry not my future, or my future husband. God has that in his hand and it is all planned to a T. I had this feeling that I wasn't going to get married when I thought I was which of course because my time and Gods time is different. I prayed and let it go...so I thought. A week passed and I was talking to my friend Leah about the same issue, it looked as though still a week later I was thinking and consuming myself about it. She made a comment that I will never forget...and right then I had my reality checked. "How are you going to teach and preach to young girls that it is okay to be single, when you aren't okay with being single yourself?" Funny eh? Here I am gearing and praying up about this all girl ministry, and wanting to teach them its okay to be single and to pray for their future husbands yet that is something that consumes my thoughts? That wasn't okay with me, and I know God is saying "Jana, you know what is right, you have prayed about it and I want to take it from you...you just have to give it completely to me! Not a little, not only sometimes, fully, and RIGHT NOW!" So that is my challenge. I know God has someone for me, and I have no clue about any details. That is the beauty of it. I love the scripture and used it all the time, I think it is perfect for this situation.
"For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future" -Jer. 29:11
He has bigger and better plans for me! I can not wait to see what they are! :)
xoxo
-J
Love you, and love this. What a blessing you are going to be to so many people in the 512!
ReplyDelete:) It is very hard. I know that I dealt with the same exact thing but I compromised during those times sometimes. Thankfully God brought me back to reality too. It is a challenge to wait, hope and trust in God's timing but it is such a reward too! You don't want anything less than God's best for you. :) I love you!! :)
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